fix critical SafeToQueueDeletion ordering bug and unsafe .First() in stats query

SafeToQueueDeletion was called after adding the DeletionQueued lifecycle
entry in Categories 1-3, meaning the check always found a fresh entry
(<5 min old) and returned false — deletion tasks were never enqueued.
Restructured to check before mutating lifecycle, matching Category 4's
correct pattern.

Also replaced .First().EventTimeUtc with .Any() in the dangling runner
metric query to safely handle runners missing CreationQueued entries.

Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 4.6 <noreply@anthropic.com>

Author: elasticroentgen