Fix unchecked map access in xnnpack (#19008)

Introduce remapId function that checks error instead of
std::unordered_map::at(), which throws std::out_of_range in noexcept
functions causing std::terminate(). Applied across all ~30
node-definition functions in XNNCompiler.

retake #18804, for windows
compatibility

Co-authored-by: Github Executorch <github_executorch@arm.com>

Author: lucylq